Franz? wrote:Hey, here's an idea, lets put up sirens everyplace more than 6 people may gather, and create a couple thousand more government jobs for directors of explaining why the system failed to work, er I mean Directors of Emergency Preparation H.
Then we can create another industry to paint and install signs explaining what to do when the siren blows.
Then we can have meetings about how many languages the signs must be printed in, and more meetings on how to get people to read the signs.
Then there can be more metings to determine what to put on the signs, after the meetings to develope a plan of what to do with all the people when the emergency occurrs. Probably ought to be a meeting on how to flood the fleet of School Busses too.
Hey, we better have a meeting to decide if the people who got fat from eating all the bagels and donuts in the other meetings are entitled to free personal trainers and gym facilitys too.
Then we will need to appropriate funds to build more meeting rooms and furnish them with appropriate furniture, and of course toilet facilitys. Better have a meeting to see if the Executive Director deserves a personal bathroom adjacent to his/her office too, cause everybody knows Executive Directors are full of crap. Gotta have the proper infrastructure or progress can't be made.
Once all the infrastructure is in place, phones installed and hooked up, emergency lights in case the office and conference center needs to be evacutated because locating it in the subbasement that floods wasn't a good idea are installed, and the center is fully handicap accessable, we can get down to discussing why the agency was originally formed. Well, really, we can't yet, because the Director and Assistant need County vehicles, and we must define the scope of their authority, who reports to who and who has authority over who in terms of interagency communication and intercourse. You gotta be real careful there, can't go stepping on anybody's toes in the uniformed services, and no that doesn't include sewer workers even though they wear countyprovided uniforms.
Naturally, this all needs to be accomplished within the timeframe set forth in the original mandate from the legislative body that authorized the formation of the agency, or somebody will need to be brought in from the consulting world to lobby politicians for an extension of timeframe.
Then the question needs to be answered, is an environmental impact study necessary to determine if the loud noise made when sirens blow detrimental to the nesting habits of the canary rat and flying squirrel. If the study is necessary, that will require a suplemental budget, and more time.
By this point in time it will become evident the entire Emergency Center needs to be moved because tha accumulation of farts in the basement room have caused the paint to peel off the walls. Naturally relocation will be undertaken on an emergency basis, and space will need to be rented while toe Office of Office Utilization locates appropriate space for the agency. Meanwhile, everybody on the comitty will need to attend a meeting on holding meetings in PuertoRico in the winter months.
At that meeting, they will learn of the new computer driven reverse 911 systems, and upon returning to their new rented office, will need to redefine the scope of response to the original problem, whatever the hell it was.
Fletch wrote:That area is probably as anti-siren as the entire state of Florida is.
We don't want to alarm the tourists and senior citizens now, do we?